Just Survive Somehow
by booklover1997xx
Summary: "What happens if you don't come back? How am I supposed to live with that? What the hell am I supposed to do?" Enid's point of view from the beginning of season 7.
1. Chapter 1

She wasn't sure how long had passed, but it felt like a lifetime. From the second she had heard the closet close behind her Enid hadn't been able to breathe. Nightmarish thoughts seemed to fill her with dread, it was as if she could actually feel them all dying from her captivity. Her last words with Carl were replaying repeatedly in her head.

 _"What happens if you don't come back? How am I supposed to live with that? What the hell am I supposed to do?"_

The words seemed to be getting louder in her memory, to the point that it was deafening her in the tiny closet. She honestly didn't know what she would do if he didn't come back to her. Carl had been the only person to truly accept her, except Maggie and Glenn it seemed. Ever since Glenn had found her after she ran away, Enid had been growing closer to them. It had been a long time since she had let adults in like that, not since she had watched her parents die before her, in fear that she would lose them too. Now it seemed to be happening all over again.

An image of Maggie doubled over in pain on the floor snuck back into her memory, and the feeling of dread grew even bigger in her chest. Only this time it was paired with a feeling of guilt. She had wanted to be there for Maggie, to help her. Glenn was still missing after going in search of Daryl, along with Michonne and Rosita, so she felt obligated to be there for the woman who she had hoped would become a mother figure for her. Rationally, Enid knew she would be safe with Rick, Carl, and the others but she couldn't quench the feeling that was fuelling her stomach. That someone wouldn't come back alive.

Although it was a selfish thought, she couldn't help that hope that Carl, Maggie, and Glenn would be ones to make it back. She couldn't go back to being alone. It was as she had said to him, she wasn't sure she could live with being alone again.

 _"Just survive somehow."_

The words that seemed to be haunting her. The first time she had said them to someone other than herself was to Carl when the Wolves had attacked. He had asked her many times where they had come from, but she hadn't wanted to share that story. The story of her mother's last words. In this moment, she couldn't help but hope that they didn't become the last words of yet another person that she cared about. That she would have another conversation with the boy that meant so much to her.

It felt like hours had gone by when the door to the closet opened. Before her Father Gabriel stared at her in shock. "Enid, what are you doing in there? I thought you left for the Hilltop with her group?"

Not knowing what to say she just walked around him and out the door. She headed towards the gate in hopes that they had already returned, her heart sinking when she saw no sight of the RV they were travelling in. The feeling of dread in the pit of her stomach had become so strong that it was now filling her with pain. Knowing there was nothing she could do until they returned, Enid headed back to the house Maggie and Glenn lived in, up to the guest room that had become hers in recent weeks, and passed out on the bed. The last thing she felt was the tear that escaped down her cheek before she fell into a deep sleep filled with nightmares that could never be as bad as the future she had in store.

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 **Authors note***

 **I love Enid and think she deserves way more screen time than she is getting, so am so glad Katelyn will be a season regular next season. This story is going to be a little insight into how I believe Enid would react to everything starting at the beginning of season 7.**

 **Let me know what you think.**


	2. Chapter 2

Enid awoke with a start, the dream still vivid in her head. It had felt so real. The sight of Carl lying there not moving had been so realistic, and it was an image that she didn't think she would ever be able to get out of her head.

"Pull it together, Enid" she whispered to herself as she wiped away the tears. There was no point to grieve for him if he's not actually dead. Her body felt so stiff and exhausted after the events of last night, but she managed to slowly pull herself out of the bed and walk to the window. Outside the early signs of dawn were creeping up at the horizon, but the paths of Alexandria seemed to be empty and deserted. From her window, at the front of the house, she was just about able to see the front gate and was yet again disappointed. They still weren't back. All of a sudden the huge home that was usually bustling with comfort and love that always seemed to radiate from Glenn and Maggie felt so lonely and dark. Not being able to stomach the feeling of being this alone any longer than she had to, Enid went for a quick shower and got ready for the day.

As she walked out the front door she realised there wasn't anywhere for her to actually go. Looking around her down the street, she saw Father Gabriel sat on the porch of the house that belonged to Rick, Carl, Michonne, Baby Judith, and Daryl. Figuring she had nothing else to do she headed over in his direction.

"Hi Enid, are you feeling better today?" He kindly responded, reminding her of her rude behaviour the night before.

"I guess. Just worried. I'm sorry for yesterday." She quietly replied, feeling slightly ashamed of her actions.

The Father smiled kindly at her. "It's no problem honestly, I think we all get it. We are all scared for them. I was slightly confused though, how did you end up in the gun closet?"

Thinking about that last interaction with Carl reminded her of the nightmare that fuelled her dreams last night. "Carl locked me in there. I was trying to get him to let me go with them to help Maggie get to the Hilltop but he refused and locked me in there."

"I'm sure he was just trying to protect you. Carl is a good guy. He seems to really care about you."

"Enid ducked her head, she couldn't help the small smile that arrived on her face. "Yeah. I just hope he makes it back to me."

"He will. The whole time I've known him he's proven himself to be very strong. He a survivor Enid, he'll be back." He looked her dead in the eyes. The words filled her with a strange form of comfort.

 _"He's a survivor"_

She hoped that was true.

"Look, Enid, I know it's cheeky of me to ask but I was hoping you would be able to look after Judith for me while I get some sleep. I've been on watch all night." After she nodded the affirmative. He headed back towards his home by the church and she headed inside. She found the small, blond toddler in her cot in her room, awake and playing with the cuddly bear that had been found for her on a run. When she saw Enid walk into the room she immediately held her arms out to be picked up with a huge grin on her face. Giggling softly to herself, Enid picked up the babbling child and pulled her out of the cot.

"Cawl?" Judith questioned, looking around the room for the big brother she adored.

"Not yet, sweetie" She answered as the blond child's face dropped. "Soon though. I hope." The last sentence she whispered quietly to herself wanting to keep the little girl happy.

After getting Judith dressed and fed, Enid found herself joining the young girl in playing with her toys. A few hours later Judith was bored with playing inside, so Enid took her out for a walk through the neighbourhood. There had been no attacks from the Saviors recently so she forgives it would be safe to do so.

As they neared the end of the road she heard shouts from by the gate. "They're back. It's them. Open the gate."

She couldn't breathe. They're back. They're here. She ran as quickly as she could with the pushchair and made it just as the RV was stopping its engine. She watched carefully as the group walked out of the vehicle, all wearing matching looks of horror and pain. Enid held her breath as she watched them individually walk out. Aaron, Rosita, Eugene, Michonne, Rick and finally Carl. As she looked eyes with the boy she had grown to care for she felt relieved.

 _He's here. He's alive._

It was as if she could finally breathe again. Until the tear fell from his eye. Enid looked around once more. People were missing. She could faintly hear someone in the background voice what she was thinking. "What happened? Where are the others?"

She couldn't take her eyes away from Carl, who was staring blankly back at her. But without looking she already knew that Maggie, Glenn, Daryl, Sasha, and Abraham were all stepped up, his usually calm speech wavering as he spoke. "We ran into the

Rick stepped up, his usually calm speech wavering as he spoke. "We ran into the Saviors on the road. Maggie is at the Hilltop with Sasha. But Negan, he took Daryl. And he..." He broke off as if the words physically couldn't leave his mouth. But he didn't need to say anything else.

They were dead.

 _Glenn was dead._

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 **Authors note***

 **I'm sorry for the shortness of the past two chapters, they will get longer as we go through.**

 **I hope you are enjoying so far and there will be some Carnid interaction next chapter I promise.**

 **Let me know what you think.**


	3. Chapter 3

It felt as though someone had flicked a switch to make her feel completely paralysed. She couldn't move, couldn't say anything, or even think any logical thoughts. All she could do was stare. Her eyes remained linked to the broken, blue orb that belonged to Carl. He wouldn't look away. He knew her too well for that.

Rick's voice, with help from Michonne and Aaron, was struggling to continue the story of what happened to them in the background, but she couldn't hear what he was saying. She didn't want to. She didn't need to. Glenn was dead that's all she needed to know.

 _Glenn was dead._

How was she supposed to deal with that? He was going to be a father. That's if Maggie was okay and made it to the Hilltop. But it wasn't just that. Glenn was supposed to be her father. He was the one person to give her hope after her parents died. How could he leave her

What happened next was a little hazy to Enid. Everything started turning blurry. The last thing she knew for sure was Carl's voice shouting her name before it all went black.

*Time Lapse*

 _Something felt wrong._

Enid opened her eyes to find herself on the sofa in the Grimes house. She glanced to the floor in the middle of the living room to see Judith content playing with her toys.

"It was a dream." She breathed out. But that thought confused her even more. If it was a dream why was there a pain in her heart? She slowly pushed herself to a sitting position and looked around the room. There were voices coming from the kitchen and so she lifted herself up and headed in that direction.

Unsure of how to act, she hovered in the doorway. She glanced quickly around the room to see Carl and Rick sat at opposite ends of the table, which Michonne stood leaning against just to the right of Rick. Aaron and Eric stood by the sink and cabinets with Father Gabriel and Spencer was hovering uncomfortably by the door. No one had seemed to notice her yet, so she stayed where she was and listen to what was being said.

"We need to do something Dad, they can't get away with it." Carl was facing the other direction to her, but she didn't need to see his face to know what he was thinking. The tone of his voice showed that he was beyond furious at this point. His shoulders were tense and his fists on the table had turned a very pale white they were squeezed together so tightly.

His father sighed in response. She could tell that this argument had most likely already taken place at least once. But by the look on his face, Rick seemed to have given up. "There is nothing we can do Carl. This is how it is now."

"They murdered Abraham and Glenn!"

So it was true. Glenn really was dead."You think I don't know that Carl, I saw it too! We are doing this so that no one else dies!" Rick argued back. He couldn't even look at his son, making Enid think that she was missing something. What else happened? Please don't have let anything happen to Carl.

"Enid you're awake. Are you okay?" Aaron had finally noticed her, and everyone automatically turned to look at her. In an instant Carl was on his feet and in front of her, studying her face for any signs to indicate how she was feeling. He placed one hand on the side of her face in a soothing way that helped in a minuscule way to heal the pain consuming her.

She turned to Aaron, not believing the question he had asked. "Is that a serious question? The only person I had learnt to trust after my parents died is apparently dead. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to be okay." She knew in her soul that wasn't true. She knew she could trust these people. Especially Carl and Maggie. But Glenn had been the one to make her see that she had a home when he had returned her to Alexandria. She wouldn't be here if it hadn't been for him. She most likely wouldn't even be alive.

"Oh Enid, you know that's not true honey. You know you can trust us. We are all here for you." Michonne walked towards her and placed a gentle hand on her arm. The gesture was so kind it helped to comfort her in a way only a mother knew how to do.

"So tell me. Tell me everything. I wanna know what happened to Glenn. And Maggie, is she okay?" Enid locked eyes with the women in front of her, begging her for the truth. With a small nod, Michonne walked to a vacant seat at the table, pulling Enid along with her to sit in the next seat. The older woman turned to her and began telling the story from the moment they had left Alexandria all the way up to when Enid had fainted when they returned.

She couldn't look up from her lap. Enid could hardly bare to listen, but she knew that she had to hear it to be able to know what had happened. As Michonne spoke, the younger girl could feel her heart getting heavier as the story went on. She couldn't believe what they had been through. Negan and the Saviors had to pay for what they had done. The anger began bubbling at the base of her stomach, clashing with the grief and pain that filled her heart. Suddenly a warmth began to fill her body beginning as she felt a weight on her hand. Glancing up slightly she saw a larger hand covering her own tiny one. As she trailed her eyes up she found herself seeing the heartbroken look on Carl's face, his tear stained cheek matching her own. In a strange way though it helped to know that she still had him.

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Author's Note*

I'm sorry for the break between updates but here it is.

Let me know what you guys think.

Thank you to those who have already reviewed and commented it means a lot.


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